People have stressed the need of communicating in a relationship, and this has led couples to seek better ways of communication. Communicating in a relationship with your partner involves more than just talking, you need to learn how to listen to your partner for you both to feel satisfied in the relationship, and for needs to be met.
You may be wondering why you need to learn how to communicate with your partner. You are aware that we spend most of our time with our partners, and we need to avoid unnecessary misunderstandings that may come up because of a lack of good communication.
When you know how to communicate with your partner, it is easier for you both to trust each other, resolve issues that may come up quickly, and generally become closer to each other because of your deep communication level.
In this article, I will share with you how you can communicate better with your partner for a more enriching and happy relationship.
How to Communicate Better With Your Partner
1. Learn the way your partner likes communication
Some people prefer to bottle things up, some prefer t say things directly, while others love to deflect from communication by bringing in humor.
Also, a person may love to be spoken to, while others need to be communicated with light touches to drive the point across. To communicate better with your partner, you must learn how your partner loves to be communicated to.
Know when to throw in light humor to lighten the conversation where necessary, learn how to divert the topic when needed, know how to make your partner feel heard, and loved. This will make them willing to communicate with you.
2. Listen to your partner
Some people will never open up until you ask them the right questions that will prompt them to speak up. A relationship is not just about taking, but also giving. Your partner’s needs have to be met in the relationship, you can find out if it is met or not by asking questions that will reveal that.
When you ask questions, also try to listen to your partner, listen to what they say. Seek clarification where you do not understand them fully, and implement their ideas when there is a need for it.
You should not fall into the habit of waiting for the opportunity to speak while your partner is communicating with you because you may not listen to what your partner is saying, and the purpose of trying to communicate will be defeated.
3. Practice honesty
No one loves conflicts or misunderstandings in a relationship, but you need to be honest in telling your partner exactly how you feel, and what your thoughts are concerning a particular thing.
There can be no effective or honest communication with your partner if you believe that they won’t listen to what you have to say. So, in a bid to avoid unnecessary conflicts you decide to bottle everything in.
Initially, deceptively acting like everything is okay may seem like a good idea. But, in the long run, you will start feeling resentful toward your partner because you cannot express your thoughts honestly. It also affects the intimacy and connection you both had.
4. Be actively present
We sometimes know when someone is not listening to us when we are communicating with them. It could be in the way they nod their head absentmindedly, zone out during the conversation, or pay attention to their phone instead of us.
Dedicate an hour or so each day to be fully present while communicating with your partner. You have to let go of the distractions that may want to pop up. Let them be assured that you are giving them your undivided attention.
Our lives can indeed be stressful in more ways than we may like it, it may even make us want to bring our stress into the relationship. But, when you are stressed, angry, or feeling any other form of negative emotion you must be able to talk to your partner during that state. It will help you both grow.
5. Keep the past in the past
I know of people who can never let go of past wrongs or hurts they have suffered from you. Each time a disagreement comes up, they use it as an opportunity to bring up every wrong thing you have done, thus tending to hamper effective communication with your partner.
You need to let the past go. The past should remain in the past. When there are issues, focus only on the present issues, and sort them out. Communication, trust, and intimacy need to be built for a relationship to stand strong.
Body language also plays a great role in communicating effectively. Your facial look, your stance, and how you respond may communicate a different thing to your partner from what you intend. Know that nonverbal actions also affect communication in ways more than we can imagine.
Even when you guys have disagreements, there is a way you can still communicate that makes them aware that though there is a problem, you still love them.
Conclusion
A relationship cannot thrive, and it cannot exist for a long time if partners cannot communicate with each other well, or in a way that it should be. Communication is vital, that is why it is important to know how to communicate with your partner well.
There must be a decision by both parties that there will be good communication. If one person wants to communicate, and the other just ignores it, the person may get frustrated that their effort is not paying off.
Imagine trying to initiate a conversation with someone, and they only give you one-word replies? It will be obvious to you that they have no interest in pursuing any good conversation with you.
So, make the decision to communicate effectively with your partner. Learn to ask open-ended questions that will make them give you more than one-word replies. A relationship works better when both parties can put in the effort to make it work.